The Noise of Darkness: The Quiet of Dawn - Day 53

Day 53 (Monday 22nd January 2018)

53 years since the launch of TIROS 9, on 22 January 1965. It was the first weather
satellite able to provide pictures of the entire Earth. It orbited around the world
12 times per day and had a camera on each side with a wide-angle views so
every section of the globe could be seen twice per day. It proved a life saver
in 1966 when meteorologists used its real-time pictures in December 1966 to warn
the residents of the Fiji Islands of a rapidly approaching hurricane, providing
them with sufficient time to evacuate. (NB picture not taken by TIROS 9)

Today is the start of a very busy week for me. I feel slightly like it is the lull period before the next onslaught - it was my husband's birthday yesterday, my youngest son's tomorrow and then I have an Executive two-day offsite and an awards event to look forward to before Friday. I hope you have a good week ahead of you.

Today's post is by Perry Timms. I first met Perry when he was still working within corporate HR - he was Head of HR - Talent and OD for the Big Lottery Fund. It feels like a lifetime away, although he has not lost his energy and drive. Perry has run his own business (People and Transformational HR Limited) since August 2012. In October last year his book, Transformational HR: How Human Resources Can Create Value and Impact Business Strategy, was published and he is a well-known writer and orator. Perry is widely recognised as being comfortable speaking out for what he believes in. What is perhaps less well known is that he is sensitive, spends much of his time thinking and feels things deeply.

He cares about HR and its future. Living (and having grown up in) Northampton, he was until last year on the Committee and a former Vice Chair of the Northants CIPD branch. He enjoys socialising (with the right people) and football - he is a Northampton Town football fan. As you will see from the below post, he is passionate about music and is a self-confessed Soulboy. You can follow him on Twitter (his handle is @PerryTimms) or read his blog (on his business site), or his former blog (Adjusted Development). He is eager to connect with those with whom his words and thoughts resonate, and believes that it is possible to change the world..."one conversation at a time".

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There’s a lot of talk of overcoming adversity, triumph and challenge that this marvellous series of blog posts has revealed.  I could sense how important the openness of the personal stories people have written about is both for them and others.  And how this series of posts was hard but necessary for some people to share.  I have quietly applauded all who have written for this. I have occasionally shared and commented on the posts.

And yet I’ve still been troubled somewhat.  A troubling that has been with me since 2016.  Maybe a little before then but amplified by socio-political events of that year and 2017.

I’ve seen the noise of darkness on social networks.  I’ve smelt the rotten decay of angered souls and lost minds.  I’ve felt the vicious attacks and utterly despicable words used by people and thrown like caustic liquid at the social media accounts of others.

Corrosion

In short, social media has developed a wretchedness that I’ve had to work hard at to shield myself from.

Not to shield myself because I want to stay “in the Shire” ignoring the imminent peril from Mordor.  

To shield myself from the feeling of despair that humanity is lost.  To shield myself from experiencing emotional trauma I could do without.  To shield myself from the distractions of false crusades I could never do good from.

I’ve experienced a lot more dark noise from my social networks than I have enlightened joy.  So I’ve withdrawn.  Many will have noticed this, some might have been pleased by this.  Some will wonder why.

It’s because I don’t want to be party to more noise and I want to be choosy about when to shine some light.  So that the light hopefully becomes more valuable, more unexpected and pleasant and has more warmth.

The dark noises would say to me:

“You’re a coward”“You’ve gone cold on us”“You don’t care anymore”“You’re not here for us”“How can you learn if you don’t face that which you disagree with and enter into debate?”“Echo chamber - pah.  You’ve regressed into an adult version of your playground gang”“You have a duty to bring about balance”“Don’t go, we miss you”“So all that evangelising about social networks - it was fake wasn’t it?”

Fuck that.  All of it.

I’ve withdrawn more because I care more. I care more about myself, my sanity and that of those who have come to mean the most to me.

So the light voices will say

“It’s nice when you appear”“I value it because it’s not there so often”“You make me think”“It shows I matter, that’s important to me.  I thought I was just another number in the network”“You seem gentler, more thoughtful, I like this”“Just what I needed right now”“Cuts through the crap”“Different”

And they’re my hopes, and aspirations and wishes and dreams for how I want to be perceived on social networks.  

Not ubiquitous, or constant.  Not reliable or ever present.  Not just there. Not too easily dismissed. Not overplayed.

Not noisy.

I adore a singer called Maxwell.  He came out in 1996 with Urban Hang Suite - one of the most defining soul music albums of the 20th century.  It - and he - were adored and lauded. Championed and extolled.

He followed a couple of years later with the album Embrya. It wasn’t adored - it was different, more esoteric.  

He then released Now, equally, not adored, a return to rootsy gospel soul-funk.

He disappeared for a while.  We missed him.  Then we forgot about him.

Then he came back.  BLACKsummer’s night.  One of the most eagerly awaited returns I can recall.  I loved it.  It still wasn’t Urban Hang Suite - nothing ever will be.  But my goodness did I value his return.  I recalled why I loved Urban Hang Suite and him.  Why I was moved at the concert I saw him perform at the Royal Albert Hall.

I was glad he was back and I was glad he was quiet for a long time.  It gave me time to appreciate him even more.  And he hadn’t returned; he was new, different.  Confident in his new self and his new music.  He followed up again blackSUMMER’S night.  Again, no Urban Hang Suite epoch-type moment, but continued worthy music and writing.

Maxwell resisted the urge to become noise, or disappear completely.  He was choosy.  Circumspect. Wiser. Warmer.

He had peaked at Urban Hang Suite, but that was OK.  We all have that.  

I’m using Urban Hang Suite now as “my finest moment”.  

I’m not going to destroy myself trying to recreate that.  I’m just going to continue to experiment and find my BLACKsummer’s night.  

So we can appreciate each other still. If you want me to keep creating Urban Hang Suites, we might have a problem.

Because there’s loyalty in this too.

Loyalty appears to be when you stick with people even though they haven’t captured that first moment of excitement and bliss, that wow and that spark.  I don’t think you can ever “be” that person again.  You can though continue to have worth and value, merit and impact and appreciate people for that and not what you liked at first.

I’ve seen loyalty and I’ve seen the opposite. I’m OK with it.

If you liked my Urban Hang Suite but haven’t like anything I’ve done since, that’s OK.  We have memories.

If you’ve never even liked my Urban Hang Suite then I hope you still enjoy the Smiths or whatever you’re into.  I didn’t write to please you anyway.

If you liked my Urban Hang Suite and even welcomed my disappearance or quietness and you like my BLACKsummers night “new me”, then that’s why we’re cool with each other.

For Dark isn’t a colour to me - it’s noise, coldness and rejection.

Dawn is musicality, warmth and welcoming.

Thank you Kate, all other authors in this series and thank you Maxwell.

Solstice reveries and reflection - Day 21

Day 21 (Thursday 21st December 2017)

21 December is the astronomical first day of winter in the Northern Hemisphere. 

It is known as the Winter Solstice and is the day with the fewest hours of sunlight 

for the whole year. The word comes from the Latin "sol" for "sun" and "sistere"

meaning "to stand still". In folklore, today was a traditional day to bring sprigs of

holly and ivy (symbols of masculinity and femininity respectively) to the home, both being 

evergreen they acted as a talisman and reminder that the leaves and crops would return. 

Holly was viewed as protective - evil spirits would get trapped in the branches of the tree.

At the Solstice the Oak and Holly Kings would fight, with Oak winning to rule until the Summer 

Solstice. In the Middle Ages unmarried women used to tie a sprig of holly to their beds to

ward off evil spirits. Ivy was seen as symbolising peace because of its ability

to link and bind two different plants together.

After today I am on holiday until the start of 2018. I will be driving down to my mother and sister's tonight, to ensure that all is OK for them over the Christmas period. Today's gem is written by Kate Jones, the founder of Inspired Lives a company that specialises in facilitating individual and organisational transformation based in Manchester. Kate is a superb coach. She and I first met in real life when she was exhibiting her business at the CIPD's annual conference a few years ago, we got chatting and a friendship was formed. Kate is highly intuitive and sensitive to the needs of others, whilst also being commercial and highly organised. She has a flair for understanding people (and not just because she has studied psychology). Kate commenced her career as a lawyer and spent time in professional services, consulting, media and financial services before founding her own business in 2000. She is the former in-house European General Counsel and General Secretary for Kellogg's and has many Blue Chip organisations on her CV. I love catching up with her via Twitter (her handle is @Inspired_Lives - she provides intelligent insight and much appreciated cheer. It is a pleasure having her as a contributor to this year's Advent Blogs series. 

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21 December The Solstice – In the northern hemisphere this is our shortest day. With nature dormant all around us this is a good time for us also to be still, quiet and rest. Consciously notice and appreciate the returning light and the energy of rebirth. Focus on renewing our inner light. What will it take to turn that spark into a flame?

In the southern hemisphere the sun is at its fullest and highest. In the peak of expansiveness we are reminded that from here on the days begin to draw in. 

Embrace the season. Wherever you are today

‘Live in each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit, and resign yourself to the influences of each.’ Henry David Thoreau (1817 – 1862).

Engage with the ebb and flow of the season exactly as it is where you are. Align with its pace, work with its metaphors. Enjoy what it feels like to be in tune with, rather than resisting, the patterns of Nature around you.

At Inspired Lives we use the Winter/Summer Solstices to retreat and reflect.

‘Take a rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop’ - Ovid

Sometimes it takes a lot of courage to STOP and say “No, not now”. Whether in our personal or business life it takes a certain steeliness to withdraw when chaos surrounds us. Time is of the essence when it comes to decision making and all manner of stakeholders are looking to us for answers or direction. The urge to please, rescue or solve a problem, can drive us to make a decision before we are ready, have all the pertinent facts, have asked all the questions, researched the options and taken time to look for another/different way.

And yet, what is the price of not doing this? Those who are used to making time for a retreat know that they cannot afford not to.

The definition of retreat includes ‘an act of withdrawing, to reconsider’.  Retreating, stepping back or away from a situation, set of circumstances or habitual way of being gives time to distinguish between what is true and what is false, what is real and what is fiction - a distortion born out of fear, reflex (unconscious automatic) responses, assumptions, partial information or even unconscious bias and hidden agendas.

Taking stock of where we are allows us to appreciate subtleties, uncover the roots of the challenges we are facing, review alternative perspectives and discover wider possibilities. Consciously allowing time and space for reflection helps us find a calmness and centredness that will bring clarity and insight.

Traditionally the calendar year end is a time for reflection; the beginning of a new year, a time for refocusing and re-engaging commitment to action. Taking time out to do this is not a luxury, it is a necessity. Any leadership role or senior management position is highly visible, with great expectations of positive impact both from the organisation and from the individual her/himself. High profile and high stakes in a constantly changing economic environment are likely to be pressurised and stressful. It is also an incredibly exciting and creative challenge, full of potential and possibility.

Colourful Coal

Day 20 (Sunday 20th December 2015)

20 standard bottles of wine are needed to fill a Nebuchadnezzar. This huge bottle, when full of Champagne, weighs, on average, 83.5 pounds. The above picture is a Nebuchadnezzar of an extraordinary sweet wine, Chateau Yquem, in a cradle to assist pouring. The name is derived from ancient history and The Bible - Nebuchadnezzar was the most powerful of all Babylonian kings; he ruled from late in the 7th century to the middle of the 6th century BC. In The Bible he is renown for having his dreams interpreted by Daniel and for going mad, in response to his pride, until he converted; in history he is credited with being responsible for the construction of the Hanging Gardens of Babylon and for destroying the temples in Jerusalem.

Today's post is written by Annette Hill, and brings back a favourite character from last year's series, Wizard Oscar. Annette, having taken voluntary redundancy, now runs her own HR Consultancy called Acumen HR, based in the South West of England. She writes an interesting blog that focuses on learning and development called Net E-Learning (but I like its URL http://nettylearning.blogspot.co.uk). You can follow Annette on Twitter, her handle is @familyhrguru.

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I was struggling with this year’s theme, ‘coal dust and comet tails’. It sounded wonderful - full of metaphorical possibilities - in fact it had so much potential (for going really well or getting too tangled) that I decided to interview my mythical, mystical mentor and old friend, Wizard Oscar, to see if he could help. You may remember him from last year’s blog, and my dad’s bedtime stories. 

A picture of Annette's dad

Here’s the wizard's bio:

Wizard Oscar

HR Director

Education and background: Oscar joined the top team 6 months ago, following a successful career with Magic Circle Aggregates and other constructive industries. A Fellow of the Chartered Institute of Positive Demystification, Oscar is passionate about Diversity and Inclusion. When not busy writing his popular blog, Wizarding Wise Words, Oscar enjoys caving.

*Magical powers: A powerful, though forgetful wizard, even Oscar is sometimes surprised by what he is capable of.

Interview Extract:

Me: Hi Wizard Oscar. How are you?

WO: Still helping people to thrive, I think, trying not to have to rely on my magical powers. Not quite ready to move on to my next incarnation yet.

Me: Good. It’s great having you around in real life. And Wizard Willow Wand?

WO: He’s really well, in his element in fact, encouraging mindfulness.

Me:   Brilliant. Anyway, thanks for agreeing to have a chat about coal dust and comet tails.

WO: It’s a pleasure my dear. Now then, I’ll come back to coal dust, nasty, messy stuff. Comet tails however, well those fan tailed goldfish can be rather beautiful and very soothing to watch.

Me: I know, we used to have one, but I’m not sure we’ve been asked to be that literal…

WO: Of course, just encouraging calm thoughts and images, before we get too deep and meaningful. Remember, I have known you, and shared stories with you, since you were a little girl. It’s an intriguing theme I think, but why have you decided to chat with me about it?

Me: I suppose I’ve had quite a challenging year. When I first read what the theme was, I instantly thought of coal dust as negative, and comet tails as positive. That worried me because the image in my head was of an empty coal bucket, by an empty fire grate, with nothing but this dark powdery dust in the bottom… dirty dust as well that could be spread wide and make a terrible mess… hard to clean up. 

Whereas the comet tail was bright, illuminating and beautiful, but also rarely seen and short lived.

WO: OK… Those are quite powerful images. Would you like to say more?

Me: Well, I had to work quite hard to start to get those images out of my head and to think differently. The risk was that the negative image was empty, but not empty in a cleansed way. The powder left over, unwanted, but capable of staining and then hard to remove, could overwhelm the brightness of the gorgeous comet tail…

WO: Remember that I have known you your whole life. Remind me of that story you told me once about Comet Hale-Bopp?

Me: (Smiling) Oh yes, Belinda was nearly 3 when it was visible in the UK. We were so excited. I remember Mr H holding her at her bedroom window so she could see it against the night sky. She was so happy to see the Gromit in the sky, but we had some explaining to do about the whereabouts of Wallace…

WO: So how are you thinking about comet tails now?

Me: Hmmm. Well, the actual moment didn’t last long, but it gave us a lovely and amusing memory and, yes…. a wonderful insight to seeing things differently, with a fresh pair of eyes.

WO: I can visualise that too. Your positive memory and feelings about that are quite contagious.

Me: Thank you. But what about the coal dust?

WO: Well, in some worlds, coal dust can be compressed into diamonds…

Me: What? I had no idea.

WO: ‘Wizardpedia’ comes in quite handy sometimes.

Me: Hang on, I thought you were trying not to use magic these days…

WO: (Winking). Sometimes needs must. Let’s think about the qualities of diamonds.

Me: Shiny! Sparkly! A girl’s best friend…

WO: Yes…. But I’m thinking technical qualities.

Me: I thought we weren’t being too literal?

WO: (Looking stern) Stick with it if you can.

Me: Oh, you mean carat, cut, colour and clarity?

WO: Yes.

Me: I’m not sure I’m with you.

WO: We just talked about seeing things differently and fresh pairs of eyes. Let’s think about all of that coal dust…

Me: Yes, I suppose the challenges did take a lot of energy. They left behind more than a few empty coal buckets… I did my best not to contaminate other part of my life (my family and relationships) with the negative dust.

WO: Several empty coal buckets. That’s a lot of dust. Imagine it was compressed into a diamond. An insightful diamond full of learning. How many carats?

Me: Enough for it to go onto Elizabeth Taylor’s wish list.

WO: Excellent. What about the cut?

Me: Many facets. Very, very many.

WO: And the colour?

Me: It’s not dark anymore. In fact, it’s looking quite colourful and bright.

WO: Finally. Clarity?

Me: Now, do you really have to ask?