It Only Takes a Spark - Day 41

Day 41 (Wednesday 10th January 2018)

41 miles - the length of the Metropolitan Line on London's Underground railway
- the system's 11 lines total 250 miles in length, which makes it the longest metro system
in the world. It commenced on 10th January 1863 when the Metropolitan Railway opened
a line between Paddington (then called Bishop's Road) and Farringdon Street. It is the
oldest and first underground railway for general public use in the world.

Today I am catching up on some of what we have achieved with money clawed back from the UK Apprenticeship Levy and cementing plans for the year to come. So far we have individuals undertaking MBAs, others benefitting from management training and a group who are joining us as conventional apprentices, commencing their careers. It is always good to know that you are helping people to develop and grow for both their advantage and for the business. 

Today's post is by a chap who is superb at encouraging others - Steve Browne, an internationally known and highly respected HR star. In addition, Steve acts as a unique unifying gel for many of us in the global HR community, cheerfully making contact and encouraging others to do so.  For the past 11 years Steve has worked for LaRosa's Inc - Ohio's leading pizzeria business and a regional restaurant chain that has grown significantly over the past 60 years. Steve is the Executive Director of HR. He has worked as an HR professional for over 25 years and has gained experience in Professional Services, Manufacturing and Consumer Products in addition to Hospitality and Leisure.

Steve possesses amazing levels of energy and passion for people and all that he does. He is married to Debbie and they have two grown-up children (of whom they both are justifiably proud). Steve is an active leader in the SHRM (Society for Human Resource Management) in the USA - and was elected to serve as a Director on the Board just over two years ago. He blogs both for the Society (SHRM Blog) and also on his own site Everyday People, as well as tirelessly communicating with HR professionals and interested parties around the world. His enthusiasm is infectious. I strongly recommend that you follow him on Twitter (his handle is @SBrowneHR) if you have not already done so.

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I am a hopelessly optimistic human !! It’s odd to see how others respond to my personality, demeanor and approach. It’s amazing how much skepticism and doubt I encounter because we think that if people are positive it’s either some act or a sham. People automatically think that if you’re positive, then you must want something from them. There has to be some hidden agenda because NO ONE is truly optimistic these days.

Sorry to disappoint.

I’m astonished to see how jaded and hardened people have become about all facets of life. It makes me ache. Literally. I am not so naïve as to not see the incredible challenges and dysfunction that exists all around the globe. I also know that this same level of instability exists in my family, friends and co-workers. I choose, however, not to succumb to the darkness.

I empathize with others who are facing challenges without judgement. Something may seem an easy fix for some and be a mountain for others. We need to remember that people don’t want to be “fixed” – they want to be seen and acknowledged. There is an easy way to do this. You need to be the spark that rekindles the life and passion that exists in every human being !!

In my recent past, I was the Scoutmaster of Troop 941. I spent twelve years in Scouting with my amazing son along with many fantastic young men.

They came from all types of family situations ranging from affluent to poverty. Homes that were healthy and others that were not. Positive relationships with parents and siblings as well as those who couldn’t be in the same room as other family members. I never stepped in to try and “fix” any of their conditions. I had no right to do so, and that wasn’t my role.

I was there to be a spark in their lives. I’d be so geeked to see them attend a Troop meeting !! I’d see how they were doing as humans and check on how they were doing in school and at home. I’d listen to every single story and make sure to give them my full attention. When we went on campouts, I’d stay up to play card games with them and make sure they had everything they needed to learn, lead and succeed.

One of the first skills that a scout learns is how to make a fire. Now Boy Scouts is led by the young men in the Troop and not adults. They learn from each other as peers. So, the older scouts teach the new scouts. When it comes to fire building, the older scouts let the new ones try to “figure it out” first with little direction. Inevitably, the boys pile enough wood to start a bonfire, and it fails. After several fruitless attempts, the older scout steps in and shows them that you only need a very small amount of kindling and – a spark.

Once the new scouts see how little material is needed to start a campfire, they get it. A spark is all that is needed !!

This same approach is what happens to us as adults. Instead of stripping back the trappings of life, we pile on more and more until we’re almost immobile. We want to move ahead, but we can’t. We’re stuck in our circumstances and it seems hopeless. It isn’t. We have the chance to strip back all of the excess junk and get down to the basics. Then add our spark.

This coming year look out amongst your friends and see how you can help them unburden themselves by being the light that gives them confidence and courage. Be intentional and be the spark that brings them back into life that has joy and purpose !!

Voices in my head

Day 39 (Sunday 8th January 2017)

39 - the number of years since Carrie Fisher appeared in the first Star Wars film.
She played the role of Princess Leia with a combinations of grit and wit - much
in the way that she approached her wider life. In addition to being an actress
she was a writer, producer and humorous commentator, as well as a candid voice on
what it is like to be an addict and a sufferer of various mental health issues.
Carrie Fisher died on December 27th 2016, 4 days after experiencing a medical emergency on
a cross-Atlantic flight. Her mother, the actress and film star Debbie Reynolds, died the following day.

It's a whole week since those New Year's celebrations - how are your resolutions holding? 

Today's post comes to us from Switzerland. It is written by the lovely Sara Wyke who lives in Geneva with her family and is able to take a boat to work across the lake to Lausanne every day (I am very jealous). She is a Learning and Development specialist for Frontiers, the open-access academic publisher specialising in scientific peer and post publication reviews, established by scientists, in 2007, as a spin-off from the École Polytechnique Fédérale de Lausanne.

Sara, who is British, is married to a wonderful Belgian fellow and they have two daughters, whom she refers to as Tiny and Bean. Sara studied Environmental Studies and Psychology at university in the UK. She remains interested in others and the world. She is active on social media and can be found on Twitter under a simple "Sara", her handle is @TeenyTinyBean.

I have added a couple of illustrations, but all of the photographs have been supplied by Sara.

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Voices in my head

I like a challenge. It really helps me focus, and I love the feeling of achievement when I accomplish something.

This year, I was looking for a challenge, something to take my focus off a job that had become more draining than enjoyable. Over the last few years I have taken to cycling around the lake as my yearly challenge with my friend Andrew. It's a big stretch for me to cycle 170km in a single day, especially considering that I don't do that much training to be in peak shape. This year I wanted something different, I wanted some space for myself. I don't like to think of myself as selfish, but this year I really wanted to focus on me.

I had loved reading and watching Wild byCheryl Strayed, and played by Reese Witherspoon. Like many people who enjoyed the story, I pictured myself doing a similar  adventure, but could not imagine being away from my family for so long, let alone the financial cost, since I am the main breadwinner. So I turned to more books for inspiration, next came the Hairy Hikers trek from the Atlanticto the Mediterranean along the Pyrenees. I thoroughly enjoyed David Le Vay's easy prose, and klutzy travel story. I noted with joy, that he had done a second book and quickly bought and devoured that story.

This was my challenge, I had found it, the Tour du Mont Blanc hiking around Mont Blanc.

It was a big enough challenge, hell it was a huge challenge for me. I dabbled in some hiking, having been dragged along with my parents through my teenage years. But this was for me, all of this was for me. I was going to hike alone, and the wrong way round just to ensure that I was alone rather than falling into step with other hikers.

Why the huge desire to go it alone? well I think I have always been a people pleaser, and it is exhausting. At work I rarely said no, I don't think I knew what limits were. I never understood people who said something was out of their scope... I get it now. So at work I was exhausted from always being switched "on", constantly trying to put my best face on, even in tough times. Then at home with Tiny & Bean I would always try to keep them happy, doing whatever I thought was the "right" thing. You see, the thing is, I've had some tough times in the last 2 years. Now I don't want this to be a sob story, but to be frank I had a burn out in the summer of 2015, and 2016 was looking like it could head the same way if I didn't do something about it.

So the hike was my time to be alone, focus on me, and not have to please anyone else.

I loved the planning stage of this challenge, I think I listened to the hairy hikers about 15 times in a few months, David Le Vay's soothing voice filling my ears as I drove to work. Sometimes It was the only thing I looked forward to about going to work, and, looking back, that should have been a huge warning. I started telling people about my idea in May, but it wasn't until June that I really started to believe this would happen. I booked the time off work, and gosh was that needed. My Fab hubby would take Tiny & Bean up to Belgium for the week I was away, but asked "could you be back on Monday?". This didn't seem to faze me, perhaps it should have done since it meant me doing the hike in 9 days instead of the usual 12 recommended in the guide books.

I booked my accommodation each night, I planned my route in detail, gathered my equipment and looked forward with a fluttering tummy. I decided to raise money for Mind with the hike, but I honestly didn’t put much effort into fundraising (We are Mind). When the day arrived, I sat in the car at the starting point about 2 hours' drive from home and asked myself if I was really going to do this? "Hell yes!" came back the answer loud and clear so out I got, loaded up my rucksack, and hit the trail.

I walked. In low cloud on the first day, then in shining sun and blistering wind. I crossed streams, rock fields and snow (once on hands and knees, but that's a whole other story!). I did meet people, lovely people, either crossing paths or at the refuges in the evening. I was slow, often being the last person to arrive at the shelter at night. I injured my knee early on and this made the walking both slow and painful, especially downhill, but it didn't stop me.  One particular night I arrived where I had planned to sleep, only to be told the hostel had closed down and the next place was another hour away. It was already nearly 9pm and dusk was falling. I cried, the only tears of the trip. But then I asked myself "What are you going to do? Sleep in the open?" and again the answer was loud and clear "Get Walking now!"; I hiked as fast as I could that evening. Arriving at the refuge in Bionnassay at 9.15pm and laughed with pure relief. The beer that night was the best.

The last day was the longest day ever. It was the world cup final and I wanted to arrive in time to watch and relax. I hadn't counted on the double mountain pass, as well as the injured knee, slowing me down. I hiked. I hiked. I hiked. Evening was closing in, I was back in Switzerland now, and the final stretch. Except the snow had been late this year, and so, even though it was July, the snow melt was swelling all the streams that cascade down the mountains. My path was covered in streams that should have been dry by now. Instead they were torrents that I needed to cover, hopping from rock to rock. The sunlight fading, my knee in agony, fatigue filling my body. There were no villages that I could stop in and add an extra night. A dreaded the thought of me slipping in one of these streams, gashing my leg, breaking a bone or 2. What would happen to me then? All alone? My voice came back louder this time, "KEEP GOING, You can do this". So I kept going, it was long, it felt like the longest day of my life.

I arrived back at the start point at 10.30pm and slept in my car that night, after watching the second half of the football. It was the most comfortable bed of the adventure.

It is now December, and I have a new challenge ahead, an exciting new job building the L&D and HR function in a fast growing start-up, ready for the next stage of growth. Looking back I realise that during my long hike, for all my efforts to be alone, I was not. I had a strong, determined, resourceful woman with me the whole way, all I had to do was listen to my own voice.

9 days

172km

376,010 steps

Better things to come

Day 11 (Sunday 11th December 2016)

11 - the total number of medals won by Cuba in the 2016 Rio Olympics.

My advice would be not to pick a fight with a Cuban; almost all

the medals were for some form of combat sport - 5 Golds (3 for Boxing,

2 for Wrestling), 2 silver (one for Judo, one for Wrestling) and 4 Bronze

(3 for Boxing and the last for Athletics - the Women's Discus Throw)
Cuba had a big year in 2016 including USA lifting sanctions and 
the death of Fidel Castro.

Alex Moyle is the writer of our Sunday read.  He feels as though 2016 has been a year of hollows, however he is determined not to let things get the better of him. Alex founded his own businesses in 2014 and 2015 - one is a specialist consultancy, Selzig, which helps organisations enhance sales performance; and the other, Elevated Recruiting, takes Alex back into his arena of corporate expertise in which he worked prior to going independent, namely providing learning and development to recruitment firms, helping consultants enhance their skills. For over 17 years Alex worked for the globally renown recruitment firm Robert Half. After proving himself as a consultant he progressed to being the UK Staff Development Manager.

Alex lives near Bristol with his wife and family. He is an engaging speaker.  H is also an active voice on social media - a prolific blogger and a regular contributor to debate on Twitter and LinkedIn. You can follow Alex on Twitter (if you don't do so already), his handle is @Alex_Moyle.

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Better things to come

I can take or leave most of the things associated with Christmas.  But I do love  the way the Christmas period encourages everyone to let go of the past and hope for a better year to come.

From a personal perspective I am glad to wave goodbye to this year.

My old manager used to say "Alex, when you succeed you get paid in cash, when you fail you get paid in experience".  

Well if this is true 2016 has made me a millionaire!

2016 has challenged my purpose,  my confidence as a father, husband and a human being.    Despite all my aspirations and passion, most of the year has felt like I was fighting a losing battle against the cosmos.

I would love to be able to write this and tell you how every day I still leapt out of bed with 100% passion to defeat the foes. 

The reality is, that on a lot of days, I have struggled with direction, passion and desire to fix the problems fate has put in my way.

Paul McGee in his book "Sumo" talks about people succumbing to a victim mentality and how this is, in part, caused by a person playing the wrong records (thoughts) in their head on loop.

I have definitely had times where I would be a case study for Paul's views.   The weird thing being that whilst you play those negative records in your head there is another voice that's locked in prison cell in in your head shouting "stop playing those records", "Stop being a victim". 

For a moment it seemed like I might need to buy a Harley Davidson to cap things off!

It is fortunate that the other little voice  did not taken long to break out of his cell and put the "victim voice" in his place.

Whilst I would like to say that his escape was all my own work. The reality is that family, friends and random acts of kindness helped the good voice to rise to the fore once again.

But enough of the confessional, what am I going to do to stop it happening next year....

For 2017 my aim is to:

- Focus on doing less things, but executing each one better.

- Work harder to recognise the little victories that are often ignored

- Adapt my expectations in line with the circumstances that present themselves

So that is my confessional, what about you the reader?

I have no doubt that most people will have had their own challenges this year.

Art Deco Bronze "Sisyphus" by Ganu Gancheff

All I ask is that you think about how you can leave the bad things behind in 2016 and look forward to better things next year.

After all most of us will be feeling better about 2016 than David Cameron and Hillary Clinton……….

Who would have thought it….!

Eat, drink and enjoy being with your friends and family in the coming weeks.

A Christmas Dole by Joseph Clark, (1834 – 1926)