The Power of Praise - Day 25

25th December (Christmas Day)

25 (or "Pachisi", which is "25" in Hindi) is the national board game of India. It is a game for 2-4
participants played on a board shaped like a symmetrical cross. It was first mentioned in records
in Medieval India. It requires a combination of strategy, numeracy, probability and luck for
a player to win - bit like life.

Welcome to Day 25, Christmas Day - I hope you are enjoying the series to date. I think we have had some exceptional posts and today's is no exception - it is by a new voice, Diane Fennig. Diane is based in Atlanta in the USA and works as a search consultant for the Human Capital Group Inc. - part of the global Cornerstone  International Group. Diane is lively, positive and passionate. She is an excellent storyteller and writes beautifully, as you will see. I love the joyous tone and generosity of her piece - perfect for Christmas Day ( although I suspect that she wanted it posted slightly earlier in Advent). Its message applies to any and every day of the year.

At work Diane focuses on assisting within the higher education sphere, working  with universities and colleges. Prior to moving into search she served as Director of the Career Center at Augusta State University, where she developed and implemented a comprehensive Alumni Career Services Program and authored GeorgiaHire.com, a shared resume database program for 34 institutions within the University System of Georgia. Diane has a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology and Secondary Education from Marquette University and a Master of Science degree in College Student Personnel from Miami University. She also holds a Doctor of Philosophy degree in Educational Leadership and Organizational Behavior from the University of South Carolina. Diane is a graduate of the Relationship Masters Academy and serves as an ambassador in the Relationship Management Program. Outside work, Diane is a very capable cook. You can follow her on Twitter, her handle is @FansofFennig.

Both she and I wish you a joyous day, please spare a moment to proffer some praise to someone else who has done something good. (I am going to start by mentioning Diane herself for being so kind writing this post for the benefit of all of us).

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The Power of Praise

Born and raised in the Catholic Church and schooled there too, I still can recount the many symbols of Catholicism. I can still recite the Act of Contrition and the Rosary to this day, but I digress. When I heard Advent, I was transported to a church pew of yesteryear.

As a teen, I recall the December Sunday morning banter between siblings and a mom before church. The young girl noted, “someone should tell the priest that the candles do not match?"  As the mom readied an answer, the older brother chimed in, when we get to pink, the real count-down begins. The third candle, the sole pink candle of the Advent wreath, represents joy. 

The young brother got it right, joy is the answer.

In this challenge from Kate Griffiths-Lambeth, I was immediately drawn to the high fives and the power of praise and joy along our journey. 

Praise and joy can be offered, witnessed and received in so many ways….

--it is the unexpected hello, acknowledging a stranger, and bidding a sincere hello?

--maybe, a random act of kindness, from paying for someone’s coffee or bringing the morning paper to the door of a neighbor? 

--or, a hand-written note thanking someone for their efforts on a project or for a special gift?

--it could be a public acknowledgement of someone for their work or efforts?

--maybe, an unexpected favor? 

--or, is it the gift of time to gather and celebrate? 

--maybe, it is a bouquet of flowers?

--it might be a homemade treat? 

--could it be complimenting a young boy for exceptional manners? 

--maybe, permitting someone who appears in a rush, to step in-front of you? 

--or, is it commending a sales person for exceptional service? 

--might it be shoveling a neighbor’s driveway?

These efforts take little more than time. I can promise that you will continue to smile long after this act and the recipient will remember this event with a similar smile.

It is magic, spread some joy and more will come your way…

This power of praise is available 24/7/365.

Back to my Catholic roots, make a Joyful Noise...

The Wassail Song

Here we come a-wassailing

Among the leaves so green;

Here we come a-wand'ring

So fair to be seen.

REFRAIN:

Love and joy come to you,

And to you your wassail too;

And God bless you and send you a Happy New Year

And God send you a Happy New Year.

Our wassail cup is made

Of the rosemary tree,

And so is your beer

Of the best barley.

REFRAIN

We are not daily beggars

That beg from door to door;

But we are neighbours' children,

Whom you have seen before.

REFRAIN

Call up the butler of this house,

Put on his golden ring.

Let him bring us up a glass of beer,

And better we shall sing.

REFRAIN

We have got a little purse

Of stretching leather skin;

We want a little of your money

To line it well within. 

REFRAIN

Bring us out a table

And spread it with a cloth;

Bring us out a mouldy cheese,

And some of your Christmas loaf.

REFRAIN

God bless the master of this house

Likewise the mistress too,

And all the little children

That round the table go.

REFRAIN

Good master and good mistress,

While you're sitting by the fire,

Pray think of us poor children

Who are wandering in the mire.

REFRAIN

Never Alone

Day 44 ( Wednesday 13th January 2016)

44 candles are needed, in total, to light the menorah (the 9 lamp, 8 branched candleabrum
used in the rituals during the Jewish holiday of Hanukkah - a celebration of the
rededication of the Holy Temple).  Hanukkah is observed for eight days and nights with a new
lamp lit each day, it is in addition to the earlier lamps being replaced and relit, so the number of daily
candles required are cumulative. Eight candles, one for each day, and one light that stands apart from the
others, called the Shamash, from which all are lit. Other Hanukkah festivities include eating oil-based
foods such as doughnuts, giving gifts and playing with Dreidels (a kind of spinning top).

Today's post is by Susan Popoola, the Managing Director of Conning Towers, a business founded in 2001 in Milton Keynes that specialises in providing practical business solutions to organisations and people with HR issues. She is also the founder of the social enterprise, Engaged For Success CIC, with has a strong focus on young people and issues such as deprivation and exclusion. Related to this, Susan is an award winning speaker and author with a reputation for championing diversity and inclusion, you might like her book on the impact of immigration and multi-cultural society - Consequences: Diverse to Mosaic Britain or, if you like urban history and culture, her first book, Touching the Heart of Milton Keynes. Susan has many years of HR experience and an interest in the power of technology to enhance businesses and the capabilities of the individuals within them. You can connect with her on Twitter - her handle is @SusanPopoola. Outside work Susan is actively involved in education - she is a governor for Hazeley School chairing the Support and Development Committee. She also serves as a Young Enterprise judge and a Business Ambassador for Countec Education Business Partnership. 

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Never Alone

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. 
"Pooh!" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw. "I just wanted to be sure of you.” 
― A.A. Milne, The House at Pooh Corner

As one year begins to draw to a close and a new year sets in, there is often a tendency to reflect on the year, review the plans made at the beginning of the year and make new ones for the forthcoming year.

I’m yet to meet anyone who says that they made plans for a year and achieved everything on the list. 

Sometimes we come pretty close and even achieve some phenomenal things that were not on the list, but no one really achieves everything.  Sometimes we or at least let me say, I, have got to the end of a year, reviewed my plans and been quite disappointed. This happened to me last year and so I sat down and wrote a list of the things that I had achieved. I was pleasantly surprised and I believe the same would apply to anyone who went through the same process. We often do better than we give ourselves credit for.

Something else that I have come to realise from going through such processes is that there’s nothing that I have achieved alone.  At times support comes from people that I’ve known for a long time, that I consider part of my inner circle, that if I’m to be honest I dare to expect to support me, just as they know that I will always be there to support them. In these cases I’m not overall surprised, just appreciative that they have been faithful to me and come through for me. 

At times support comes from the least expected place. I have no reason why these people reach out to support me – especially without me asking for help or indicating a need to them.

There are also the things that people do that come as a surprise – whether people from my inner circle or not. The unexpected gift, a kind word, the invitation to an event, the recommendation, or the mere mention of my name by someone that I thought had forgotten that I existed, as we haven’t spoken in years. The person that I bump into, who mentions how much he or she likes reading my articles or tweets and finds them to be most useful.

It’s not all one-way though. It means just as much to me to be able to give people help and support of some kind. To help them move that step forward, to overcome a challenge. Even just that little thing that puts a smile on a face makes a lot of difference to me. I actually believe you get more out of giving too.

All in all, my support system says that there are people out there that believe that I have value and worth – because of the big things that I strive to achieve, the fact that they know they can always count on me; I make them laugh or put a smile on a face – or what have you, just because I am who I am. What this says to me is that not only am I never alone in my journey and in what I achieve, but that I can’t give up. I must go on (regardless of the odds) as there are people cheering me on and counting on me to succeed.

The why that draws people in is not always clear.  I think it’s something about passion and purpose, but I’m not really sure – I don’t really ask. Maybe I should as feedback as important  - it’s fuel and it’s reinforcement.

In terms of feedback I’ve always been one to say thank you.  However, if I’m to be honest, I think it would be fair to say that I don’t take the time to let people know how much I appreciate them and the value that they bring as much as I should.  

Going forward, I intend to do this much more as contrary to what we may think, people often don’t know how much they are valued and saying so may make all the difference. Preventing someone from giving up on a job, a relationship, and a project….  By not giving up that person may go on to do something that has a positive live changing impact for them or someone else.

#Selah

Happy Holidays - Day 22

Day 22

22 yards (known as a chain)
is the standard distance between the two wickets on a cricket pitch.

Other unusual measurements include a link (100 links = a chain),

A fathom, which is 6 feet (derived from Anglo Saxon faethm meaning an embrace, because

it is roughly the distance from 1 hand to the other if your arms are outstretched) and

a league (3 miles) which is the distance an average person can walk in an hour.

Today's seasonal post is by Christopher Demers. Based in Austin, Texas, Christopher is an influential figure in global HR, happy to share wisdom and insight with interested individuals around the globe. He has worked with Dell, P&G, Home Depot and Apple and is currently a Senior HR Consultant for Travis County, specialising in Talent Management, Organisational Development and Employee Relations. Christopher writes an excellent blog, ChristopherinHR, (as well as producing a weekly Best Blogs list to share others' great posts). You can tell from the below post that Christopher has a way with words (he is also a fine poet and public speaker). He and I first became acquainted on Twitter, his handle is @ChristopherinHR

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Happy Holidays

It's that time of year again.

All of us – even Ebenezer Scrooge – manage a bit of a smile when the cold winds first blow and we realize the year is rapidly coming to an end.

"Scrooge Awakens" - illustration from the Diamond Edition of
Dickens' A Christmas Carol in Prose: being a ghost story of Christmas, 1860

Why doesn’t this beautiful feeling last?

Many people will tell you the key is to keep Christmas in your heart all year. A nice idea but this essentially waters down the notion of Christmas. Why not try to keep yourself in your heart all year? It might be easier.

When the holidays arrive feelings that have been muted take over. We become more forgiving, more gracious, more understanding. Is this not our normal self though? Think about the time you enjoy with your family and friends this holiday season: how relaxing it all is when the big feast is over, the presents unwrapped and the stress of holiday planning is a thing of the past. How can we get that good feeling all year?

The true meaning of Christmas is not that we can be happy and peaceful bringing good will to others every December but that we could do this all year if we wanted. 

How?

• Drop Expectations. By now you know the numbers: 90% of what we worry about never comes to pass, and the 10%, well somehow or other we learn to deal with that. Holding expectations of others simply sets us up for failure, since most of the time those expectations are unshared or at least unvalidated. Better to be in the moment and act consistent with your beliefs and perspective and stop assuming others will have similar views. Let people be who they are and go easy on yourself.

• Take Time. So many of life’s needless conflicts arise because we are too quick to respond or assert ourselves. Feel like you’ve beeb snubbed in a meeting? You lash out at co-workers. Partner not appreciating you? You do silly harmful things to them. Friends taking you for granted? You skip the next happy hour widening the chasm between you. Stop it. Take a time out, and recognize you’re not the center of the universe. Give yourself a breath and see how much better things can be.

Print by print by Sarah Sherman Samuel

• Acknowledge Others. Part of what resonates with Christmas is our willingness to drop our guard a little and tell others how we feel about them. But why don’t we do this all year? Because its risky. We have to take the first step, and might be rejected. But you might not be rejected too. You might find others happily reciprocating to your action. You might find the peace of satisfying relationships can be experienced all year. Recognizing others as a way of being will help you build stronger and healthier relationships all year.

That Christmas is a special time is without doubt. Yet, a few simple modifications in how you view yourself and others will bring the true meaning of Christmas – peace and joy – to you all year round.

Merry Christmas one and all.